Symbolic Clutter

The more you read this blog the more you will realize my complete and utter gratitude and admiration for the author Karen Kingston. Her book "Clear Your Clutter With Feng Shui" truly changed my perspective about clutter and how to think about it. One perspective she offers is to think of the symbolic nature of clutter. She has some wonderful stories and insights about this in her wonderful book, and it got me thinking about the messages my clutter was sending out into the world.

When I was a young girl I collected frogs. Especially stuffed animal frogs. I loved the phrase "You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you meet your prince". I had a decorative tree in my room and started piling these stuffed frogs on the tree. People caught on to the habit and started adding frogs of their own. Boys I dated, especially wanted a frog on my tree and so many of those frogs were from young men I knew.

About a year before my boyfriend (now husband) graduated from The Naval Academy, I knew he wanted to marry me, and I knew that when he asked my answer would be a resounding yes! Suddenly, my frog tree seemed very out of place in my life. One day, I gathered all the little girls in my neighborhood, who I'd babysat for over the years, and invited them over to my house to pick frogs from off my famous frog tree. These girls were delighted, and squealed with delight as they carted home arm fulls of  toy frogs. It felt wonderful. I kept one frog, the one Josh gave me, just a few months later he proposed. Today that little frog belongs to our son.

What do the items in your house say about you and your life, is it reflective of you are and who you want to be? Is it time to ditch your frogs and make room for your prince?

Master Bedroom Part 2 of 2

In my last entry I talked about the approach of decorating a master bedroom to reflect a more feminine side. In this entry we'll discuss the merits of a more balanced approach in decorating a master bedroom.

Creating a bedroom that unifies both masculine and feminine is a beautiful way to honor each partner and their taste. The idea is to create a space both people feel totally comfortable in. Where as in a more feminine room the spirit of the room invites a man to enter, in a combined room both sides are equally represented.

The most difficult part of creating such a room is in the communication and compromise when it comes to style. It's really important for each of you to take the time to search through magazines and choose pictures you each love to use for discussion and reference. As the two of  you gather more and more photos you will begin to notice patterns in the examples. For instance, I have been gathering pictures of beds I love for many years. One day I lined them all up and looked at the collection as a whole, I noticed that a certain canopy treatment showed up multiple times, and when it wasn't featured one very similar to it was. Now I know exactly the type of canopy my dream bed has, because I had already chosen it multiple times from various sources. You will see patterns like this too.

Here are a few patterns to look for:

Color are you repeatedly choosing warm colors or cool? Black and white with a hit of one color, or multiple colors? Do your colors have a more naturalistic feel with lots of browns, greens and other earth tones? Are your colors bright or subdued? Do you see a lot of white in your pictures? What are your favorite colors to wear, often this is a color you are very comfortable with.

Textures are you seeing a lot of soft, fuzzy, furry textures in your pictures, or finishes that are harder, sleeker and clean? Texture applies to carpets and fabrics, even the plants you are drawn to. Think of a lacy delicate palm versus a wider leaf plant.

Style do you see a more tailored, finished look showing up over and over or a more layered, relaxed look?

Patterns Stripes, flowers, geometric, solids, or a collection of all of these?

Lighting are the spaces you admire bright and cheery, or dim and romantic?

Groupings what is the accessorizing like in the pictures you've chosen? What are table tops like in your pictures, are there candles, flowers and a well loved book perched just at arms reach or are the table tops simply featuring a simple lamp? Are there collections to look at, or is the room very sparse?

Paintings and artwork are there people in your paintings, animals, landscapes, abstract or graphic art? Or are you drawn to sculpture?

The more pictures you each gather the more clear your tastes will become. You will begin to notice these reoccurring patterns everywhere if you look. As you gather these pictures I highly recommend you don't analyze them in the magazine. If you mind says "yes" tear it out if it (even if that yes surprised you at first) if it says "no" just pass it, move quickly, your initial gut response is what you want to be listening too. You won't second guess yourself this way and you'll get a lot more information.

The first year Josh and I were married I felt a great desire to unify our tastes and create a master bedroom that reflected both of us. I chose a leather finished headboard, and matching chairs. I used clean lines and a tailored finish on the bed skirt. The blankets were brown and white and were quilted with subtle geometric patterns. The inspiration fabric was brown and teal, colors we both loved, the fabric featured lovely intertwining, swirling tropical flowers. I hung vintage looking tropical flower paintings on the wall, as a nod to our honeymoon in Maui, and hung long flowing curtains. The table tops were kept very clean with simple black and white engagement and wedding photos. It was a beautiful marriage of our tastes and we both loved it.

When we moved from our California abode to Washington I changed everything. Josh was deploying a lot and I felt a need to create a space that truly supported me while he was away. I wanted a romantic space that felt like an extension of me so that whenever he returned home from a deployment or a long day at work he felt entirely encompassed by my embrace, I wanted that embrace to extend into the very room he walked into.

Both approaches were just right for us at the time I chose to implement them. Josh has loved me in a master bedroom designed to reflect each of us equally and he's loved me in a room that I created to be an extension of myself. We have both been very happy in each space. Whatever approach you choose for your marriage at this time is just right for you.

How have you found ways to incorporate differing personalities in your master bedroom room?

Master Bedrooms Part 1 of 2

There are two very distinct ideas for the decor of master bedrooms, one idea is to create the room as a feminine reflection of her, the other is to meld the tastes of both partners to reflect the couple as a unit. I think both ideas are wonderful and it really depends on the personality of the clients. Trends right now are really in favor of creating a master bedroom incorporating the tastes of both people in a relationship. I do of course, have a preference (everyone does). As long as your spouse is in agreement with the plan, I really feel either approach can be implemented beautifully and successfully.

In my own home, I lean toward creating a master bedroom for her (me). So this entry will illustrate the merits of this approach. Later I will write an entry discussing the strengths of a melded master bedroom approach.

The personalities of my husband and myself really lend themselves to a master bedroom with a focus on the feminine. Josh simply loves to see me happy, and I felt very strongly that I wanted a master bedroom that truly reflected me and my idea of romance, so he handed me the reigns and said "Make it into something that turns you on." This works nicely for both of us.

The nature of romance requires a degree of invitation and surrender. By creating a room that is an extension of myself, my personality, my perception of romance, my creative expression, I am building a world I can invite my husband into. To me, this is the ballroom where we invite each other to dance. This room is such a reflection of me I feel completely comfortable and content here. In my eyes my master bedroom is the epitome of romance. And in Josh's high stress world of work, with all it's deployments, refits, deadlines, and long hours, coming home to a room that is soft and warm is always a welcome retreat. It's as if the bedroom is as eager to embrace him as his wife. And, because I am so completely happy with the space, he is happy!

Have a conversation with your spouse about the approach you feel would work best in your relationship.
The master suite is the most important room of the house and can potentially be one of the greatest sanctuaries and retreats in your marriage.

How have you found a way to create a master bedroom both you and your spouse love?

The Color of Closets

Have you ever noticed that the pictures of closets on magazine covers feature all matching clothes?

 It's brilliant.

Italian sociologist, Vilfredo Pareto observed that we get 80 percent of our results from 20 percent of our efforts. This 80/20 rule carries throughout numerous situations and has inspired many books and references over the last few years. It also applies to your closet.

You wear 20 percent of your clothes 80 percent of the time. We all have our favorites. Clothes can be a favorite for many reasons, cut, comfort, style, sentiment, but today I want to talk about color. You are choosing certain colors over and over again because they make you look and feel your very best.

Personally I love white, cream, pinks and yellow. These are the main colors in my wardrobe. All of my purses, shoes and accessories compliment these colors. I can interchange multiple shirts with various pants and skirts, and each pair of shoes compliments at least three other complete outfits. I have one cream coat that goes with everything. This eliminates my need to buy one pair of shoes for that random purple shirt that doesn't go with anything else I own. I call this interchangeable effect my "rule of three", everything in my closet can find a place with at least three other outfits to complete the ensemble.

Narrowing my clothes down to my favorites like this allows me to pass by fads that wouldn't look good on me anyway and would end up a complete waste of money. I spend a lot less on clothing because I'm not distracted by every sale or fashion whim designers throw my way.

You want the closet of your dreams? Start with the clothes of your dreams. Organize everything by color and instantly your clothes will look so much more appealing. If you are afraid of letting go of the complete rainbow packed in your closet, just put your least favorite colors or the colors you seldom wear, in a box and put it away for a month. If you really must have that burnt orange sweater that goes with nothing else you can always dig it out of the box at the end of the month. Most likely, however, you will find that you are happier not having to force your way through a packed closet in order to get to your "makes me feel like a super model awesome pink shirt."


What is your favorite color to wear?

Domestic Diva

When I was newly married I was given an apron with the title "Domestic Diva" embroidered on the front. I spent most of my young life singing in recitals, church, school choirs and competitions. The giver of this special apron, was one of my beloved music teachers. As you can imagine, I hold a special affinity toward this apron and the title it bears.

There is music in everything. I am always singing, my four year old sings Brahm's lullaby in German with me, but I sing in more ways than just my voice. When a beautiful meal is laid out for dinner, it's music, when a home is organized and running well it's music, when I’m painting a wall, it’s music when I'm holding a baby, it's music, when I'm kissing my husband, ahh...music. All of life is a song, and when there is harmony in the things we do, everything feels right. It's like our soul is singing for joy!

Just like all other beautiful music, when it is shared it inspires and uplifts the hearts of many. I have been inspired by so many passionate people in my life singing their songs with full gusto! I want to sing like that for you! I want to inspire you to create harmony and music in your own home. Create, organize, decorate, clean! And find joy in the beauty of the process. I want to help you create a home that uplifts you, inspires you and comforts you.  You can create a home that reflects the melody in your heart so when others walk through your front door they are inspired by your song.

I hope this blog helps you find that song, and gives you the inspiration you need to sing it.